My Blog

Wrestling with the ‘People Pleaser’ gremlin

24th March 2021

Hands up if you’re a people pleaser!  Yep me too!! I think lots of us are. I know for me, putting other people’s needs before…

Strategies for managing overwhelming feelings

31st January 2021

At some point, we all experience that tipping point moment when things just seem to feel ‘too much.’ It’s like your laptop with too many…

Coping with Covid – getting back in control

19th January 2021

So here we are, first couple of weeks back to work in a new decade and we find ourselves back in our third lockdown. Not…

Change your hat, change your thinking

19th October 2020

I think we could all be forgiven right now, if we find ourselves getting trapped in that downward spiral of negative thinking. With so much…

Come on up…the view’s amazing!

9th September 2020

I’m lucky enough to live right in the heart of a beautiful part of the world; Yorkshire to be precise. This picture was taken this…

Managing stress, overwhelm and that frazzled feeling!

27th August 2020

I know there’s an awful lot of people out there who are feeling stressed, frazzled and overwhelmed right now. It’s been the starting point for…

What’s in your lucky box?

6th August 2020

My Dad was one of those people who kept all manner of little bits and bobs purely for sentimental value. I’ve got really fond memories…

Do you feel like you’ve gone backwards?

4th August 2020

Now that we move into a different phase of CV-19, are you noticing a different vibe in the team? Lots of the managers I’ve spoken…

How are you doing right now?

21st July 2020

No, REALLY, how are you doing? I suppose it’s only natural that our knee-jerk response to this question is “fine” and we probably answer that…

You and your boundaries – how are they working out for you?

7th July 2020

I think it’s been around 15 weeks since all of this COVD craziness began and over that time we’ve all had a completely different experience…

Let’s talk about how change baby!!

8th June 2020

Allegedly is was Benjamin Franklin who in 1789, said “nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.” I think these days we’d…

Isn’t it time we bank what we’ve achieved?

3rd June 2020

Flaming June already? Wow! I don’t know about you, but I can hardly believe that we’re at the start of June. In some ways the…

What’s driving you right now?

11th May 2020

These are weird, tough times and I believe that what many people are experiencing is a form of stress. When we’re stressed or anxious, we…

What we’re experiencing right now is stress

27th April 2020

It’s my belief that a lot of what we’re all experiencing right now is linked to feelings of loss, fear and anxiety about this whole…

Day 8 Lockdown Diary – musings on looking after your psychological wellbeing

1st April 2020

So here we are in day 8 of lockdown as I write this and how life has changed over the last few weeks. It just…

Taking a minute to blow my own trumpet!

14th March 2020

I was working with a great bunch of managers last week, helping them to build the skills and confidence to engage effectively with challenging conversations…

Yoga, the crow and challenging our worst fears!

9th March 2020

I’ve dipped in and out of yoga for the last twenty years, but it’s really only been in the last six or seven years that…

What’s really going on when we feel anxious or stressed?

26th February 2020

I do truly believe that where I’m most useful with my clients is as the compassionate observer and witness to what is keeping them stuck.…

What can we do and say when someone shares something painful with us?

23rd February 2020

This is a question that I’ve been asked quite a few times in the last few weeks. I’ve been working with groups of managers to…

As managers, how can we best support team members who disclose a mental health issue?

2nd February 2020

Skills to help us talk about peoples’ psychological wellbeing isn’t something that’s usually included as part of your typical leadership development intervention is it? Speaking…

A trouble shared, is a trouble halved

26th January 2020

In the last couple of months, on top of the one to one work that I’ve done, I’ve also run number of group sessions aimed…

Thinking really IS your super-power

20th January 2020

Oh, no, not another post about the power of thinking! Oh yes!!! I know the topic of our thinking is the topic of lots of…

Turns out we have a naturally immunity to change!

14th January 2020

I’m often invited to work with managers and leaders, who in some shape or form aren’t making the behavioural changes that their others would like…

What to say to ourselves when we’re feeling up against it!

2nd December 2019

It’s not exactly new news to be told that the things that we say to ourselves do have a profound impact on what we feel…

Supporting mental health in the workplace

11th November 2019

A big part of last week was working with a lovely bunch of managers, helping them to find ways to handle conversations with team members…

Dancing with our inner critic

3rd November 2019

We’ve all got one.  It’s that voice, urge or whisper in your ear that seems to berate, criticise and hijack our thinking when we feel…

Opening the door on a great conversation

28th October 2019

Have you ever had one of those conversations where you’ve thought to yourself “why is it they just can’t see my point of view?” They’re…

Deliberate downtime….who knew it’s a thing?

21st October 2019

I’m reading “How to have a great day” by Caroline Webb and am absolutely loving it. It’s one of those books that’s dead easy to…

Boosting resilience

14th October 2019

I don’t know if it’s the change in the weather. Or the busyness of things in the last few weeks, but I’ve definitely felt that…

Do you make time for rest?

30th September 2019

I’ve just finished reading “Rest” by Alex Soojung-Kim Pang; not the most engaging of books but there’s some interesting ideas in there. I’m more and…

What if we don’t feel that we’re enough?

22nd September 2019

One of the key characteristics that a close friend of mine used to look for in a partner was someone, as she put it, who…

Haribo & homework

11th September 2019

My favourite advert right now is the Haribo one. The one where the aging, hairy rockers have children’s voices lip synced over their own. There’s…

Are you a shapeshifter when it comes to belonging?

9th September 2019

https://twitter.com/BBCArchive/status/1158275192386441216 This brilliant clip popped up in my Twitter feed the other day. It’s an excerpt from a 1976 BBC programme in which they’re discussing…

When they up and leave home!

2nd September 2019

Although there have been ‘back to school’ signs in the shops for weeks, it’s finally that time when the schools go back and we settle…

Befriending your inner critic

27th August 2019

We’ve all got one haven’t we? You know that inner voice that seems to get louder and more persistent when we’re not feeling at our…

That holiday perspective!

20th August 2019

Holidays are a great time to get a change of perspective. I always take a notebook and, if I’m feeling like it , I take…

Hello holiday!

13th August 2019

The school holidays are well under way now! The biggest sign for me, that school holidays are here, is the distinct lack of traffic on…

We’re all doomed!!!

4th August 2019

August can be a tough time if you run your own business. In the 20 Augusts I’ve had, without exception they’re always a quiet time.…

Look what happens when we feel under pressure!

30th July 2019

I work with TA (Transactional Analysis) a lot. As part of leadership programs or coaching conversations, when we need something through which to understand ourselves…

Reframing negative thoughts – from one worrier to another!

23rd July 2019

I suppose it’s only natural when working with people, working on their own unhelpful thinking that you start to become aware of how your own…

Am I enough?

17th July 2019

One of my tutors at Uni made the comment, that as a psychotherapist we often ‘get the clients that we need.’ What he meant was…

Coaching & Counselling, what’s the difference?

9th July 2019

As a dual trained coach and counsellor, I’m often asked what is the difference between the two and how do you know which is appropriate?…

There’s no such thing as ‘easy listening’

2nd July 2019

Would you say that you’re a good listener? I guess most of us would answer ‘yes’ to that one unsurprisingly. In this article https://thriveglobal.com/stories/laurie-powell-listening-skills-are-the-best-skills-a-leader-can-have/Laurie Powell…

Opening the box, talking about mental wellbeing at work

25th June 2019

With the increased attention that’s been given to mental health issues it’s perhaps not surprising that more and more managers are having to have conversations…

How are you at managing your boundaries?

18th June 2019

How good are you at asking for what you want or explaining what you need? For many of us, myself included, it can feel hard…

Space the final frontier!

12th June 2019

I’m increasingly noticing the ‘space’ in my life and that of my clients at the moment. At times there can seem like there’s no space…

A brief encounter & the stories we tell ourselves

5th June 2019

I bumped into a lovely chap that I know last week, and we had a form ‘verbal handshake’ that really got me thinking. He’s one…

When inspiration strikes in the dentists chair!

30th May 2019

It struck me as I was having my 6 monthly dental examination last week, literally as I was in the chair, that habits and consistency…

Turns out courage and vulnerability go hand in hand – who knew?!

17th May 2019

I’ve been working my way through a whole range of Brene Browns’ stuff just recently. She’s done some brilliant TED Talks, written some great books…

Coaching & qualifications…ranty blog!!

30th April 2019

It’s not often I get angry….although maybe my family would tell you different?! It does USUALLY take a lot to really rattle me. But last…

What no review?

23rd April 2019

One of the reasons that I love Fridays is the sense that another week has passed and there are the endless possibilities that a lovely…

What’s your own trust quotient?

16th April 2019

I love this way of thinking about how you can measure the level of trust evident in any relationship – whether it’s work or personal…

Is it really that hard to build an engaged team?

2nd April 2019

I was watching a short video by the brilliant Simon Sinek who as usual was talking about how important it is for people to love…

National Conversation Week

20th March 2019

It seems like hardly a week goes by that isn’t “national something week.” My personal favourite is “British Pie Week” but that one’s been and…

Here’s one for the toolkit – getting to grips with your stakeholders

12th March 2019

Whenever I’m working with a coachee on the topic of influencing or communication, one of the best places to start is to work through a…

Are you stuck in “Ground Hog Day”?

7th March 2019

I’ve gotta admit, I love that film and I can’t help but think of it every time I hear“I got you babe”, which is the song…

Would you need to go undercover to understand how people really feel about your business?

21st February 2019

What is culture? It’s the way we do things around here. it’s the subliminal messages that we get about what’s OK and what’s not OK.…

one tomato, two tomato, three tomato, four

12th February 2019

I know there will be lots of you reading this, who like me and many of the people that I work with, struggle to keep…

Choice & taramasalata – the key to tackling negative thoughts!

5th February 2019

I took this picture while I was out walking our dog last week. It’s a point in the walk when I can make a choice…

Gin & Gratitude

30th January 2019

Coming to the end of January, I’m on the final few days of my own little ‘dry January’ challenge. I have to be honest, it…

Pah! I laugh in the face of Blue Monday

22nd January 2019

I’ve seen lots of people talking about ‘blue Monday’ and how January is a tough month. I’ve heard people talk about the grey uninspiring weather;…

The 7 Coaching Conversations

15th January 2019

Coaching can be a lonely old business. You’re spending your time thinking about others, their issues and how to be with them in a way…

The best coaching question ever!

19th December 2018

I know that sounds like a huge claim and I don’t make it lightly, but the more I’ve worked in the field of personal development…

Getting ready for Christmas

13th December 2018

So we’re in full swing now, in the run up to Christmas. I have to admit I’m not one of those people that worries about…

I’ll never forget you Daphne!

4th December 2018

I’ve been hugely lucky to have two soulmate-girl friends in my life. One of these gorgeous women died on the 26thDecember 2014 at the age…

it’s good to talk

27th November 2018

A good friend and I often joke that, at those times when I’m really struggling or something is really getting on top of me; I…

over 50, but not over the hill!

20th November 2018

Age is a funny thing isn’t it? My Mum always told us as kids, that ‘it’s rude to ask someone’s age’ and so in some…

why don’t we ask for help when we need it?

19th November 2018

Maybe it’s because I’ve been thinking and focusing on self-care for the last week, that I’ve noticed both for myself and others that we can…

Self care is not selfish!

11th November 2018

Self-care seems to pop up all over the place at the moment. From discussions with managers around how they can build resilience to cope with…

Coffee, with a dash of relationship advice

6th November 2018

In a coffee shop in Leeds the other day, a couple sat down next to me and I couldn’t help but over hear the interaction…

What fears are holding you back?

28th October 2018

Getting the Best out of Your Conversations

9th October 2018

One of the programs that I have run time and time again is about gaining a better understanding of behavioural styles and the impact that…

Handling the Tough Cookies!

8th October 2018

When I ask people to describe the type of character traits that they find hardest to deal with in others; more often people mention those…

helping people through change

20th August 2018

It was Benjamin Franklin, writing in 1789 who was said to have made the comment, “the only certainties in life are death and taxes.” Two…

big changes come with in steps

6th August 2018

Personally my heart always sinks when clients ask me to run a session on ‘time management.’ Don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I hate…

comfy shoes and communication

30th July 2018

If you’re a shoe fiend like me, you’ll probably notice that even though you’ve got a whole range of shoes for every occasion…and maybe even…

No dramas, pass me my pyjamas!

23rd July 2018

 “no dramas, pass me my pyjamas…” I can’t use the word ‘dramas’ without smiling as I remember the famous song, by the fabulously talented Victoria…

Authenticity and why’s it’s important as a leader

16th July 2018

Over the last couple of months I’ve been working with a couple of great people, who have been helping me to refresh and redirect my…

Building commitment to change

10th July 2018

I was doing a workshop recently with senior managers, and we were looking at how we build acceptance of change and build commitment towards it.…