A trouble shared, is a trouble halved

26th January 2020

In the last couple of months, on top of the one to one work that I’ve done, I’ve also run number of group sessions aimed at helping people understand what they can do to build their resilience as a way of looking after their physical and mental wellbeing.

The first part of these sessions has been a psychoeducation session to discuss what happens both mentally and physically when we feel threatened or under stress; whilst the second part was about the practical habits, we can build into our day to day lives to build resilience and practice greater self-care.

The response I’ve had to each of these sessions has been overwhelmingly positive. Even in particularly large groups, which can sometimes feel a little unsafe or too exposing; people have shared snippets of their personal stories and some of the struggles that they’ve had with their own mental health.

It’s good to talk

Just like when I’m working on a one to one with people; I’m astounded by the impact that ‘just talking’ about stuff can have for people. It feels like such a naïve, simplistic idea that just by talking about how we’re feeling can in and of itself be therapeutic. But time and time again, I see and hear the value of just letting things be said – in a setting that feels safe, non-judgemental and accepting.

In this great podcast, Carolyn Spring discussed her thoughts on the therapeutic relationship. In it she discussed just how transformative it can feel to be heard, accepted and valued by another.


We’re hard wired to connect

As human beings we’re hard wired to connect and our survival is inextricably linked to our ability to be in relationship with others. Feeling with and connected to others is good for our health.

If we want to build our own sense of resilience, one of the things we can do, when we feel threatened or stressed is to get among ‘our tribe’ the people that we know and trust and find someone to confide in.

Talking about what’s troubling really does help. We usually don’t need or want someone to fix things for us. But to have someone bear witness to what we are feeling, without judgment and with acceptance is invaluable…it really is!

“A trouble shared is a trouble halved!”  That’s the learning from this!!

If you’re feeling under the kosh. Feeling overwhelmed or stuck. Find someone to talk to. Find someone who will sit with you while you talk about what’s troubling.

Go on, I guarantee you’ll feel better….remember it IS good to talk!!